pop-culture for the people

Are you a TRUE AMERICAN?  I often wonder this about my friends and neighbors what with all the stuff I hear in the news.  Sure they look and seem normal, but maybe they are really traitors to the nation.  Terrorists?  Nazis?  Illegal Aliens?  Commies?!  Well, I find that more often than not, they aren’t the orange-alert scourge that we are are on the constant lookout for, but the ones that we have forgotten to look for.  This oversight must be corrected.  McCarthy understood the problem.  Yes folks, I’m talking about the scourge of COMMUNISM!

If you haven’t heard of THIS GODLESS COMMUNISM then you don’t have your eyes open.  Since the 1930’s their kind has been creeping into America, bit by bit infecting it like a disease hoping to take it over and spread.  In this great nation we are faced with multitudes of worries and enemies.  Just because you are on the look out for terrorists doesn’t mean you can forget the Commies.  These pinko bastards want to take your home, send your parents away and take your religion from you.  They are evil incarnate!

Never before have you had more to fear about.  I myself have taken to living in my storm shelter with my guns (lifetime NRA member!) and a lifetime supply of peanut butter and soymilk.  With evil all around, you can never be too safe!  I’ve given up my money to the government so they can use it to pay for better national security and I encourage you to do the same.  Tax season never felt so great.  Sure I appreciate having an easy to use color terror alert system and a roll of duct tape, but like I said, you can never be too safe.

So friends, please click this link and read about THIS GODLESS COMMUNISM before it is too late.  The lessons learned in this primer are transferable to other dangers like: Facism, The Gay Agenda, Feminists (Baby Killers!), those nasty lefty’s, ooh and… Capitalism!  Err…  Wait, that’s good right?  I don’t know anymore!  I think it’s this pinko vegan diet I’m eating infecting my brain…

I’m Tom Ridge, Ultimate Defender of the Homeland, and I approved this ad.

By the way, if you are too stupid to realize this and most other government fearmongering for control of the Bill of Rights to toss it in the garbage can next to that other document they can’t seem to jam into the shredder written and signed by a bunch of irrelevant old dead guys who couldn’t seem to make a buck off treason.  I guess they couldn’t get their head around capitalism.  Yes folks this is satire.  Get over it.

-hollywood & future

Further Anti-Terrorism Reading:

At an exhibit at ICP (International Center for Photography…as opposed to Insane Clown Posse) there were a whole series of photoshopped AOL chatroom conversations. Yeah, snippets from chatrooms with sentences different colors or written in weird fonts. Whoop-de-shit. Well here’s my attempt to get on the internet conceptual art bandwagon. It’s uncut, raw…and all real. Read it and give me a government grant. Bleh.

I’m playing the part of “mechatoe,” extolling the virtues of my favorite show. A show about a fat Polish man who pulls down his pants every episode.

leooo:  the devil ?
Umm:  and the other one?
mechatoe:  hey
Umm: who is the devil is the idea here
mechatoe: anyone like NTYPD Blue?
mechatoe: NYPD Blue
leooo: umm
leooo: thats pretty neat
mechatoe: anyone want to do a NYPD Blue RPG?
mechatoe: I’m Sipowitz, so that’s taken
Umm: leooo, u like the devil?
leooo: ya
Umm: well, there we go
Umm: you like women then
mechatoe: Simone is still open
Umm: we clear this up at least
leooo: Umm you are quite unique
leooo: and strange
leooo: and thats something i alraedy knew
mechatoe: WHO’s talking to who?
mechatoe: if you want to join my RPG visit [url=http://www.monkeysvsrobots.com/]
][url=http://www.monkeysvsrobots.com/]http://www.monkeysvsrobots.com/[/url][/url]
mechatoe: weregonna start weekly meetings to rpg
Umm: leooo, i am not unique man, i am just showing you something that is real in a sense
Umm: i like to spread the truth
leooo: Umm
leooo: what are women good for?
Umm: i dont know, reproducing?
IAMCHINA: MONKEYS VS ROBOTS
IAMCHINA: GG
Umm: we need to go on
leooo: umm: fo showa
leooo: actually
leooo: hmm
leooo: ya..
mechatoe: so whos down
mechatoe: ROCK
leooo: what ?
mechatoe: who’s down for joinging up NYPD Blue RPG
IAMCHINA: NOT MONKEY VS ROBOTS?
leooo: nypd is a pos
leooo: nypd is wack
leooo: nypd is for flamers
mechatoe: yes
mechatoe: http://www.monkeysvsrobots.com/
mechatoe: i’m also gonna have a CSI RPG
leooo: what the hell is that?
mechatoe: so if leonard doesn’t like nypd he can join that
mechatoe: CSI role playing game
leooo: and who is leonard
mechatoe: or NYPD Blue role playing game
mechatoe: like dungeons and dragons
leooo: rpg is boring
mechatoe: Umm can be Simone cause he’s not mean
IAMCHINA: I’m JFK
IAMCHINA: And I kill you all
mechatoe: and leonard can be a crack dealer
leooo: who the fuck are you talking about
leooo: leonard
mechatoe: who we have to interview cause we think he killed someone
mechatoe: no, you’r Joe now
mechatoe: Joe the Crack Dealer
mechatoe: Scene one: Joe the Crack Dealeris taken into the interrogation room by Simone and Sipowitz
leooo: ???????
mechatoe: what do you mean ???? Joe
mechatoe: where WERE you friday night when thatbrobbery happened?
mechatoe: talk dammitt
mechatoe: and then simone plays good cop
leooo: k
leooo: np
leooo: k bye
IAMCHINA: Did someone play Batman
mechatoe: um
mechatoe: hey Joe your not going anywhere
mechatoe: iamchina would you be simone. ummm disappeared
mechatoe: so i don’t confuse you i’ll use

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